Scripture
But Moses pleaded with the Lord, “O Lord, I’m not very good with words. I never have been, and I’m not now, even though you have spoken to me. I get tongue-tied, and my words get tangled.”

Then the Lord asked Moses, “Who makes a person’s mouth? Who decides whether people speak or do not speak, hear or do not hear, see or do not see? Is it not I, the Lord? now go! I will be with you as you speak, and I will instruct you in what to say.” Exodus 4:10-12

Observation
When God calls a man he does not put a finger on his strengths but digs up all of his inadequacies.

Asking Moses to speak to Pharaoh was a traumatic request. First of all, Pharaoh was only the most important man on earth. Anyone might feel blood pressure increase, breathing shallow out and the voice fade in his presence. But for Moses there was more. He had childhood memories of stuttering to step over. That may seem small to some, but to a stutterer it is a huge tank trap. There were memories of being a chronic stutterer in a king’s court where verbal agility is everything. Moses would not move beyond that.

We know how the story pans out. Moses answers, “Here am I Lord, send Aaron.” The rest of the story would have been easier if Moses had not worked through a press secretary to represent him.

But there could have been another outcome. Moses was being asked to face up to his most primordial fear. What looked like cruelty was in fact an act of help from the Lord. If Moses would face it he could move beyond it.

Moses did not confront his fear of stage fright. Why? Because he expected the fear to dissolve before he spoke. But the Lord proimsed no such thing. He only guaranteed that when Moses started to speak that he would sense God with him. “I will be with you as you speak” the Lord said. The key word there is “as” Reassurance does not come until we step out.

Application
I cannot expect that the Lord will soothe my feelings until first I have obeyed him. We want the feelings to come first. But the Lord will not work that way. Instead we must obey without the feelings. Six years ago this week I went on a trip to Australia to lay the groundwork to plant a new church in Brisbane, New Hope Brisbane. It was just me and a rental car. What later became the church was not yet gathered together. I visited a conference facility and a restaurant function room on top of a hill. I remember feeling so conspicuous looking for a building without people to put in it. But within one year I saw both of those facilities packed with people. First I had to step out and then the confidence came.

Prayer
Father you sure do lead us to still waters but you do hide the fact in the middle of the Psalm that the way there comes through the valley of the shadow of death. Help me to continue to do more than my feelings allow. I want to be in the place where you are, which is always on the other side of my fears. Amen.